Out of Gas – Flash Fiction/Prosery

Out of Gas

It was already dark as he closed the car door, thankful for the red moon to light his way down the road.  How stupid to run out of gas, tonight of all nights.  Angry with himself for not checking.

This was unfamiliar territory but he knew the road followed the river for miles.  Coming to a crossroads he stopped momentarily. He felt a chill in the air and heard a moan like an autumn wind high in the
lonesome treetops.  The strange noise made him shiver. He was cold, having forgotten to bring a jacket, and the hair on the back of his neck was standing to attention. He moved on.

Feeling a presence, he halted turning quickly, but no one was there.  Looking around cautiously he resumed his walk. It was then he felt the blow to his head and everything went black.

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

Lillian is hosting D’Verse Poets Pub tonigh
and the challenge is Prosery (not poetry)
A short story of exactly 144 words excluding
the title and we are to use one of the
following lines from Carl Sandburg’s
poem Jazz Fantasia

"Moan like an autumn wind high in the
lonesome treetops" OR choose 2) "a red
moon rides on the humps of the low
river hills"

Promote Yourself Monday - Go Dog Go Cafe

Image by Robbowolf from Pixabay 

  32 comments for “Out of Gas – Flash Fiction/Prosery

  1. July 21, 2020 at 12:41 am

    Brilliant story telling.

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 12:43 am

      I think I read too many mysteries and spy stories ☺️ Thanks Sadje

  2. July 21, 2020 at 12:49 am

    👍👍👍

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 7:28 am

      Thank you Felicia 🙂

  3. July 21, 2020 at 12:55 am

    love this Christine – the sound that made him shiver, that moan of the autumn wind – beautiful writing

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 7:31 am

      Thanks Gina. The prompt lines we were given were very beautiful ☺️💕

  4. July 21, 2020 at 6:05 am

    Your piece really got to me, Christine, as suddenly finding myself with an empty tank is one of my few logical fears.

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 7:32 am

      Yes Kim. It has happened to me on a few occasions. It is quite scary 😳

  5. July 21, 2020 at 10:02 am

    I could feel the hairs on MY neck stand up with a chill. Very vivid and descriptive details in your writing. I enjoyed reading this, especially with the imagery. Excellence.

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 3:25 pm

      Thanks very much Lucy. I appreciate that. 🙂💕

  6. July 21, 2020 at 11:10 am

    The descriptions put me on the crossroad with him! Nice work Christine. As with any good flash, Im wanting more.

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 3:27 pm

      Coming from you Darnell that s a huge compliment which I will take greedily ☺️ Thank you so much! 🙂💕

  7. July 21, 2020 at 11:23 am

    oooooh you went to the dark side for this one! I am right with this person….walking….listening….cold….and then the ending. The literal ending. Well done!

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 3:29 pm

      Thanks Lillian! Perhaps I watch too many dark movies 😳 Fun prompt and I loved the two lines you shared. So beautiful I wanted to write poetry so its nice to get outside of the comfort zone. ☺️💕

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 7:07 pm

      Lillian, I realized I had mistakenly used an assortment of both prompts! It was not intentional but I was tired when I did this last night so I apologize. I corrected it and kept to the 144 words. 😳😕

  8. July 21, 2020 at 11:32 am

    Sinister and suspenseful

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 3:29 pm

      Thanks Debi ☺️

  9. Beverly Crawford
    July 21, 2020 at 2:54 pm

    Oh WOW! This gave me goosebumps. Great storutelling.

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 3:30 pm

      Thanks so much Bev. I love that feedback! 🙂

  10. July 21, 2020 at 5:05 pm

    Oh, I so feared something like that was going to happen. Great build up!

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 6:28 pm

      Thank you Dale! 😊

  11. July 21, 2020 at 5:27 pm

    Such mystery! From the beginning, it would seem the threat existed before the walk. Is there resolution, or is the last scene the end of a tragic tale? The world wants to know!

    • Christine Bolton
      July 21, 2020 at 6:27 pm

      Haha! I always have this problem with prosery. I just can’t seem to come up with an ending in 144 words so I leave it with a cliffhanger 😕. Maybe I should have put a note saying ‘To be continued’ and give it an ending in the next prosery challenge! 🤣. Or maybe begin a serial and before you know if I’ll have a short story 👍🙄

  12. July 21, 2020 at 10:39 pm

    The poor guy! I hope it was just a robber and not something worse.

    • Christine Bolton
      July 22, 2020 at 2:24 pm

      I know … maybe a body snatched 😳

      • July 22, 2020 at 2:36 pm

        🙂

  13. July 25, 2020 at 1:51 pm

    Ha! I’m wondering if like me you’ve been listening to True Crime Podcasts during the lockdown? I havent tried the 144 words for a long time. In the group I used to belong to we had 150 words.

    • Christine Bolton
      July 25, 2020 at 10:37 pm

      Then please join us at D’Verse the next time! Monday is Prosery challenge usually once a month I think. Yes I do like crime drama 🙂

      • July 26, 2020 at 12:13 am

        I will thanks for the invite.

      • Christine Bolton
        August 2, 2020 at 2:39 pm

        Oops you were in the spam box 😕 Yes do join us sometime 🥰👍

  14. August 21, 2020 at 8:45 pm

    Oh no, that’s a bad spot to be in. That’s a nightmare to run out of gas at night in the middle of nowhere. Nice job!

    • Christine Bolton
      August 21, 2020 at 10:31 pm

      Thanks so much for reading! ☺️

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