Category: Humor

Holy Cow!

I have just completed the 31 days of poetry challenge with OctPoWriMo, which I took very seriously. However I looked at the prompts today and nothing was speaking to me. So to reward myself for being diligent for the past month, I came up with the nonsense below.  It just flowed and the sillier it became the more I liked it!  Please forgive my indulgence.  I’ll be back on track tomorrow!

Holy Cow!

He was roving the countryside
Until he came alongside
A poor cow stuck in a fence
Her leg was caught in the wire
Half her body lying in the mire
Things were looking quite tense

She was mooing so loudly
But held herself together proudly
Her pain was obviously wicked
He tried to help her get loose
Struggling just tightened the noose
Her limb was looking crooked

He was fearing the worst
But there was a cloudburst
It was raining cats and dogs
She started to have a tantrum
So his guitar he began to strum
As he sat down on some logs

The music to her was calming
He could see she was a Brahman
A cow of the highest quality
If he could only free the bovine
Perhaps the owner would offer a goldmine
It was a matter of her dignity

She had slipped lower into the mud
The rain had left quite a flood
But he finally freed the poor cow
As the owner appeared
His reward he feared
Might be less than he had now

A bonanza was not on the cards
Not by many a yard
The cow was ownerless
The man who came
Was just playing a game
It was time to reassess

 

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

Word Prompts:

Roving

Loose

Tantrum

Wicked

Bonanza

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Moondance

Moondance

On the night of the dead
Dressed to disguise
My lover, I think
Looked me in the eyes

Spellbound I gazed
into the center his mask
Is this really him
I stopped myself to ask

He took my hand
and we wandered for a while
Weaving through the labyrinth
reaching the center aisle

We stopped and he whispered
Gently in my ear
Evocative words
that I wanted to hear

His voice was different
But I didn’t have a care
I shivered when we touched
I knew I shouldn’t dare

We walked on to a rivulet
Where he kissed me long
Wrapping his arms around me
So tightly and strong

We stood there together
Until I began to swoon
This was not my lover
I had just danced on the moon

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

Word Prompts:

Rivulet

Dead

Center

Labyrinth

OctPoWriMo – Poem a Day #30 – Dancing on the Moon

Photo by Kym on Unsplash

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Foul Frog – A True Story

Foul Frog – Quadrille

A frog in my mailbox
Every day I looked 
Funny I thought
But never spooked

Once picking up mail
He was still in residence
Something wet on my hand
My negligence

Brown and slimy
Smelling as I walked away
Oh yuckety yuck
Disgusting bouquet!

 

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

In response to DVerse Poets Quadrille #66 – Yuck-it-up!

A Quadrille – Total 44 words

Photo by Jack Hamilton on Unsplash

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Kingdom

Kingdom

He dominated his kingdom
As a true ruler never should
playing dominoes with servants
whenever he could

Although his indomitable skill
Preceded him in the land
His Dominican queen
could never understand

As head of the domicile
She banned it by demand
His passion for a stupid game
So random and unplanned

Her boredom was of the play
That never tested his skills
Just a game of luck she said
You should work on the treasury bill

Pressured by the queen’s wisdom
Which was pure omniscience
He finally let the dominoes fall
Terrified of her malificence

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

In response to Linda G Hill’s Stream of Conciousness Saturday – words that include ”dom”

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Meeting

Meeting

The coolness of the marble
Soothed her feeling of duress
Waiting patiently for the outcome
She smoothed down her dress

Looking quickly in her compact
She checked her hair
A stray wisp had escaped
Giving her an eclectic flair

The museum was quiet
She gazed at the artwork
Standing in front of the painting
Her face creased to a smirk

She knew he was there
As his presence was felt
Turning she saw him
And her body began to melt

She had left a trail
Knowing he would follow
He had pursued willingly
Finding her at the Picasso

He said her name out loud
By the sound she was awed
He said with authority
“You are under arrest for art fraud”

 

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

Today’s Word Prompts

Marble

Smirk

Duress

Eclectic

Pursue

Compact

 

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Charm

Charm

I am a charming
Choice number three
Three times is a charm
Or so they say
It had better refer to me

Things come in threes
You can live a charmed life
Prince Charming came along
Charmed, I’m sure
Happy to be his wife

Lucky charm around her neck
Charms on a bracelet jingling
Plenty of Southern Charm
Ladies never sweat
In fact they’re glistening

He could charm the pants
Off anyone who’d listen
Although no one cared to
She left for charm school in Europe
Parents paying for her tuition

Someone will sweep her off her feet
He’ll likely be a charmer
He will cheat on her
Three’s a crowd
So who will be his partner?

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

Photo by Roberto Nickson (@g) on Unsplash

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Smoke

He slowly rowed the
small boat
to the middle of the lake
never saying where
he was going
Just knowing what to take

Peace and solitude
It was a favorite
way to escape
He went quietly
without a sound
his plan taking shape

No one around
to question his actions
No fear of his daughter
Hell to pay
if she only knew of
his smoke on the water

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

In response to Tuesday Writing Prompt from Go Dog Go Cafe – Smoke on the Water (Deep Purple)

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Don’t Box Me In

In response to d’verse poets Quadrille #62 – BOX

Don’t think outside
the box
or even when you’re in it
Throw the box away

Containing nonsense
you never look at
Hoarding is a disease
You don’t need it anyway

Don’t get boxed in
like Jack did
He had to jump
Remember Boxing Day?

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

Word count 44 – Quadrille

Puzzle

Here’s the jig
There’s the saw
Another puzzle to explore

Outsides first
Fill in the middle
A 3D riddle

There’s a corner piece
Some sky over there
Easier when you share

Bridge coming together
Few pieces remain
We’re finished now let’s do it again

Christine Bolton – Poetry for Healing ©

In response to Quadrille Prompt word Puzzle D-Verse Poets Pub – 44 word maximum poem

Moonlight

In a moon punctured velvety sky
The stars shone like bright lights
Glinting through pinholes reminiscent of
A thousand and one Arabian nights

A backdrop dramatic in its splendor
Showcasing the beauty of nature’s jewels
She reclined on a blanket of leaves
Her eyes drawing him into her limpid pools

The young and petulant girl had matured
She was now beautiful and seductive
Contrarily he remained socially awkward
Heuristic in his approach and still selective

Her infinite beauty was breathtaking
He felt rooted in the earth
A feeling inadequacy consumed him
As he suffered in his dearth

She enthralled him on the forest floor
Devouring his manhood as she wished
Helpless in his efforts to dissuade her
Laying still until completely ravished

They lay holding each other tight
As if the other might disappear
Clinging to the sweet memory of love
Staring up at the celestial sphere

She was everything he had dreamed of
Although his superstition had given him fear
She elegantly propped herself on one elbow
And said, “Did you bring any beer?”

Christine Bolton

Word of the Day Challenge: Petulant

Rag Tag Community: Superstition

Fandango One Word Challenge: Fear

Daily Word Prompt: Heuristic

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