Tag: healing

Dark versus Light

 

Being a fairly new blogger some of you are slowly getting to know me through my poetry and things I care deeply about.  Looking back through the work that I have yet to share with you, it is clear that my writing stems from experiencing some dark moments in my life.  To me it was a therapeutic way to deal with life’s challenges. Although I have included some of these darker poems in my recent posts, I have certainly tried lately to lighten the mood with some sweeter sounding prose.   I have been using the Daily Prompts from WordPress to ignite something inside me and send me on a creative path.  I think it has been working, as I would never have thought to write anything entitled ‘Archaic’ but I did and I was quite pleased with the result!

As I am at a happy point in my life I have started to write some more enlightening poetry and hope you will enjoy it.  My intention is to post at least one uplifting poem a week just so you know I’m not a totally miserable wreck of a person!

I still truly believe that there are many benefits to writing out your thoughts, good and bad, Whether you write in a journal or put your words into poetry it can have a healing effect.  It has helped me my whole life and I’m not going to stop anytime soon.

Thanks for listening and hope you enjoy my writing.

Below is something lighthearted.

Love is Alive and Well

Yes it’s me I’m still here
You thought I had suffocated
As it happens I am alive and well
News of my demise has been grossly overrated

I am here once more
On display In all my splendor
Words of spoken passion and undying devotion
Always wondrous and tender

I am love and I conquer all
So they always say
I shoot a transfusion to your heart
So you know you’re alive for another day

Although I can be broken and stomped on
More times than you will ever know
I can also be buried deep down
And refuse to come out fearing another blow

My resilience is remarkable
Although I sometimes refuse to believe
That I can still be alive after so much pain
So for me you should surely grieve

At times I choose to hibernate
In my prepared burrow
It protects me and keeps me safe
When I fear of letting go

As Love I get to live another day
Being always brave and fearless
Laying it out there and you will point your arrows
And I will forever show you forgiveness

Christine Bolton

Where there is love there is life. Mahatma Gandhi

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Hope

Hope

There are so many people in the world who through no fault of their own go without the basic things in life.  Food, shelter, love, income, family and in some cases even a country. Such hardship and suffering exists both at home and abroad.  One thing they do all have is hope.  Hope is omnipresent and deep within all of us.  It reminds us we are alive and there is still a chance that things will get better.  We cling to it as if our life depends on it because without hope there is nothing. We have all experienced some form of despair at low times and we can feel very alone.  It made me realize how just simple gestures from those we know, and also from strangers, can make such a difference to our lives and ease some of the suffering.  A kind thought costs us nothing neither does spending a little of our time with someone who is lonely.  Sharing some food could be the difference between going to bed hungry or not for a desperate person.  If we can be anything in this life, shouldn’t we be kind?

Hope

The light at the end of the tunnel
A glimmer of something outside of pain
The thread you hang on to
So life would not be in vain

A hand keeping your head above water
Someone saying a kind word
Breaking through the silence
Like the gentle song of a bird

The five dollar bill in your jeans
That made it through the wash
You’re going to make it by any means
Your dreams will not be squashed

Optimism in the face of adversity
Don’t let them ever get you down
Pessimism is not in your lexicon
A big hug to wipe away that frown

Wishes to be granted
A talk back from the ledge of despair
The kindness of those you don’t know
Who will send up a prayer

A good wish from a stranger
Someone aware of your heartache
A basket of food left at your door
Or perhaps a homemade cake

These gestures are so small to many
But those who are down on their luck
Will absorb them like a sponge
Because that’s all they have to get unstuck

Sometimes hope is all we have
When times make it hard to cope
Life can take more that it will give
But in the end there is always hope

Christine Bolton

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Infect

Infect me with your disdain
So that I can feel your pain

Cover me with your words
And I will be your songbird

Infect me with your madness
I will wallow in luxurious sadness

Your attention could fill me to the brim
I don’t care if I sink or swim

Infect me with your poison
So my life’s blood flows crimson

Use me whichever way you want
I am yours to play with and taunt

Infect me with your anger
I am numb from everyone’s candor

This way I will feel alive
Even if it’s me you despise

Infect me with hope and longing
And I will come crawling

Give me just once chance
To taste the sweetness of romance

Infect me with your love
We go together like hand in glove

Destined for each other we will be
It is inevitable don’t you see

Christine Bolton

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Live and Let Live

Live and Let Live

I regard myself as a very lucky person.  I have had low points in my life along with dizzying heights of happiness only to descend back down again.  I am fortunate because I have experienced both.  I have been sad and happy, hungry and full, poor and not so poor, loved and unloved, young and old.

Our life, to others, is never what it seems, and it is so easy for us to judge each other.  When we are without, we envy those that appear to have it all.  When we are hungry we resent those who we perceive as squandering money.  It is always an “us versus them” mentality because it is easy to criticize and play victim.  We never really know what is truly going on in someone else’s life. Even though they might appear to have everything, they could well be suffering immense pain from health issues, or perhaps going through a divorce or even losing a family member. Such resentment on our part is unhealthy and cultivating negative thoughts can hurt us in the long run.  What perhaps would be an easier thing to do is to turn the negativity into something positive. When we are not struggling financially, wouldn’t that the best time to help those less fortunate?  When our stomachs are full shouldn’t we donate to the Food Bank?  I see life as an ongoing opportunity to experience everything that is thrown our way. To appreciate the highs and lows, the good and the bad, and to never forget where we have come from. Always remember that at some point in our lives someone has helped us up and the right thing to do is always pay it forward.  It can be hard work to get there but ultimately it is worth it.  Live and let live is an expression I use a lot and it inspired me to write this poem.

Live and Let Live

I look to the horizon
Where the sea meets the sky
My life peculiarly in balance
I break down and cry

Can this really be happening
To the likes of me
No one ever gave me anything
Without the third degree

For so many years
Just hitting the wall
Disappointment and failure
Avoiding the curve ball

What life always threw at me?
Ready or not
I never understood the meaning
Of this terrible plot

To knock me down
More times than I cared
Only for me to get up
As this game was not yet declared

Then you came along
And evened the playing field
So I had a chance this time
With no need to carry the shield

You made it safe so that I
Could be the best I could be
I am scared no more
And at last I feel free

I have been kicked around by life
Battered and bruised
I can see the light
And I am no longer confused

Now I am on the side
Of what I perceive is right
I will champion those less fortunate
As I understand their plight

Life is better for me
As you opened my eyes
To the beauty in the world
That is no longer in disguise

Christine Bolton

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Can you grieve the loss of something you never had?

Can you grieve the loss of something you never had?

The answer, simply, is yes.

A young friend of mine has just shared some sad news.  She was pregnant for the first time but had a miscarriage a few days ago. She and her husband looked forward to this special event with a guarded optimism.  They had kept their special secret until the first trimester had passed and for all intents and purposes my friend should have moved into the dreamy second trimester.

My heart goes out to her at such a difficult time, as I personally know the devastation she is feeling, not just from the physical pain, but the emotional pain that will unfortunately stay with her for a very long time. Unless you have gone through such a traumatic experience it can be incomprehensible.

In my case I realized something was terribly wrong. I knew what was happening and there was nothing I could do about it.  I prayed it was just a scare and not a miscarriage but it was too late.  I will never forget how I felt and what a severe sense of loss I experienced.  It was so profound and it stayed with me for a long time.  I managed to be rational, and realized I would recover eventually, but the miscarriage was hard to accept.  Naturally there is an emotional connection between a mother and her baby in the womb, so the sense of loss was real.  There is also the loss of future.  Hopes and dreams dashed through no fault of anyone.  It’s also possible to feel guilt at this time because you think of all the other expectant mothers who experience not one but multiple miscarriages and they manage to go on, never giving up on their dream.

My young friend will experience all of these confusing thoughts.  Her physical pain will pass quickly but her emotional pain will stay with her for a long time.  She is brave and has youth on her side so I am certain she will have every opportunity to experience life’s miracle and have the family future she longs for and rightly deserves.

The following poem came to me quickly perhaps because it came from a personal experience. I hope you enjoy it.

Loss

My heart is full with news to share
We learn we will no longer be a just a pair

An addition to our family will come in June
Such excitement all around, it can’t come too soon

Things to consider and people to tell
Names thrown around like Anna and Rafael

I am so full of joy my mind is racing
Things to buy and bargains for chasing

A room to decorate and fill with love
A precious gift as if sent from above

But the black cloud came and darkened our lives
Stripped us of happiness and cut like a knife

Swift was its blow that knocked us down
The pain hurts so much I think we will drown

The loss is difficult and hard to comprehend
What did we do wrong for our joy to end?

The sunshine has disappeared and the skies are gray
Try again, we are told, it is going to be okay

It happens frequently or so it appears
But it’s hard to accept what has happened right here

We will cross the bridge that lies up ahead
Confident that our future will not hang by a thread

To lose something you never had is somehow surreal
But with love and understanding we will begin to heal

The creation we lost will stay in our hearts forever
One day soon another will come, so never say never

Christine Bolton

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From a Dark Place

I wrote this poem at a low point in my life when I had experienced emotional pain.  I felt helpless in my situation and was sure my heart was broken irreparably and my head would certainly explode.  When I look back on poems such as this, I am always so taken aback by the darkness of my thoughts and the sheer helplessness that I felt at that time. I eventually got beyond the hurt and was able to live a happy life again, but I find it quite shocking to revisit that state of mind.  Just the act of writing down these feelings has proven to be therapeutic.  It shows me that by letting my words flow onto paper, to describe those emotions and question why, I was able to heal and move on.

I hope these words of mine will somehow resonate with you.

Despair

The darkness came so suddenly
Enveloping me and dragging me into a pit of despair
Blinded and scratching for clarity
Shocked by the swiftness of events, I call to you
You do not hear

You do not listen, you are closed
What is evident is your hurt and anger
As much as I try, you resist me
I want to help and heal your wounds
That were so carelessly inflicted in your past

Dazed and confused
I am lost without you
My love spurned and my efforts rejected
My promise to keep you safe from future pain
Falls on deaf ears

The loss of you is too much to bear
My hurt is deep
Like the slice of a knife through my heart
It will not heal
I did not know how broken you were
And now I know to my detriment

Christine Bolton

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Poetry from the Heart

Poetry from The Heart

The day is fresh and new and filled with unique experiences.  Today we talk about poetry from the heart and how words can heal and inspire us to do great things in this world.

We have all experienced heartache and we turn to different things for comfort and clarity.  In my case I had the need to speak.  When I was younger I would continually ask “Why?” to whoever would listen to me.  I never understood the pain I was feeling and yearned for explanation.  Maybe because I was a child, or perhaps in those days there such a stigma associated with emotional pain,  I could never find the answers I wanted from people.  Instead I found comfort in writing down my experiences.  In the beginning they were just words, such as ‘this hurts’ or ‘what just happened?’  In time they began to flow more freely and took the form of a poem.  The more I wrote, the calmer I became, and just laying down my feelings on paper was therapeutic.  My own words soothed me and gave me an extraordinary strength.  I was highly emotional when I picked up a pen but by the time I had written my last word I felt an immense calm as if I had meditated.

When I look back on poems or journals I have written, I sometimes have to catch my breath.  When we are at peace  with ourselves and have the opportunity to revisit our thoughts from an earlier time it can be quite shocking.  It makes me feel sad to think I was so unhappy and feeling so much angst.  As a result some of my poems can be quite dark but I think they are relatable.  I am however concentrating on writing something more uplifting and positive.  It is so much easier when you are in control and managing your personal pain.

The beauty of our lives is that we can continually learn about the world, ourselves and others.  We should always be open to change, which is of course is inevitable, and learn some new ways of coping.

I invite you to enjoy my poetry and other things that I will share with you.  Please follow my blog and hopefully I will inspire you to write down your thoughts and form beautiful poetry for yourself.

Until the next time.

Christine

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