When We Were Toxic

Posted byChristine BoltonPosted inBlog, Pain/SadnessTags:, , , , , , 
Spellbound but resisting
Never quite sure if you were real
Eventually
I fell into you
Your magic wrapped me
in promises 
Until I was weakened
Your potency 
irresistible 
I loved you deeply
Our life 
A magical mystery tour
I was the yin to your yang

And then 
it changed
Slowly at first 
until the differences
surfaced more frequently
Gaining speed 
Galloping through our lives
like a wild, snorting beast 
Brooding anger in evil eyes
Damaging that which
was precious and delicate 
Love shadowed in darkness
Words weaponized into
arrows of poison
aimed to harm

Limping and
Shell-shocked 
With nowhere to go
Except away
The virulence of toxicity
startlingly scary
Threatening harm
to both sides
How did we get here?
Where did it go so wrong?
Too late for questions 
It stops here
It stops now
Go now
and never look back

Copyright © 2025 Christine Bolton - Poetry for Healing
All Rights Reserved

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Published by Christine Bolton

I have been writing poetry since I was a child and it has helped in the good times and bad times. I am always looking within to find the answers to life's problems and to write thought-provoking poetry and prose. Thanks for checking it out. Christine

18 thoughts on “When We Were Toxic”

  3. A familiar situation so well captured it left me trembling, Christine, especially the lines:

    ‘Galloping through our lives
    like a wild, snorting beast
    Brooding anger in evil eyes’

    and

    ‘Words weaponized into
    arrows of poison
    aimed to harm’.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Christine this trajectory resonates eerily with two past relationships I was in. The first one involved physical violence and gaslighting. The 2nd one psychological torture and genuine fear of harm. Your conclusion, stop now and never look back is excellent advice. It may take awhile to wean from the trauma bond but it can be done. Thank you for your PSA ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Li I had no idea it was two times for you. I am so sorry. They both sound horrendous. My experience was bad enough but somehow I can write through it. This is not the first time I have done so but each time I do, it heals just a little more. Thanks for sharing my friend. ❤️☺️

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Christine, thank you for your sentiments about it. Muddling through life, one stumbles occasionally. What makes it valuable is that there were a lot of good times also, like you say. Also you learn. And grow stronger. I know what you mean about every time writing about it, “it heals just a little more.” Bless your heart ❤

        Liked by 1 person

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